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22-Oct-2015 21:30

And by projecting all the beneficial aspects of your new job into the present tense, you'll ward off the demons that can distort your judgment, and make you vulnerable to a counteroffer attempt.

Self-affirmations like these can do wonders for maintaining your positive energy and high self-esteem.

If your intention to make a change is sincere, and a counteroffer by your current company won't change your decision to leave, you should still keep up your guard. " Here you must be careful not to disclose too much information, or appear too enthusiastic.

A counteroffer attempt can be potentially devastating, both on a personal and professional level. They might as well ask, "How will we ever get the work done without you? Otherwise, you run the risk of feeding your current employer with ammunition he can use against you later, such as, "I've heard some pretty terrible things about your new company" or, "They'll make everything look great until you actually get there.

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More than once, candidates have called me after they've resigned, to tell me that their old company followed the three-stage pattern exactly as I described it.

As you've already learned, the job-changing process arouses all sorts of feelings. After all this time, the changes you've been contemplating are actually going to happen. This, in effect, blackmails your boss, who makes you a counteroffer only to keep you until he can find your replacement, at which point you're dropped like a hot potato. It's precisely for this reason that I'm so cautious when I work with currently employed job seekers.

During the transitional phase that begins with your acceptance of an offer and ends a month or two after you've started your new position, the emotional limbo you'll experience will be especially acute. This jolting realization will be followed by a sense of guilt. In the meantime, the trusting relationship you've enjoyed with your current supervisors and peers abruptly ends, and your loyalty becomes forever suspect. I want to feel confident that their motives are pure before we both invest a lot of time and energy in testing the market.

You should also add that your decision is final, and that you would prefer not to be made a counteroffer, since you wouldn't want your refusal to accept more money to appear as a personal affront.

Let your supervisor know that you appreciate all the company's done for you; and that you'll do everything in your power to make your departure as smooth and painless as possible. And if the fear of guilt and reprisal don't give you enough to worry about, consider the buyer's remorse you'll probably feel. You know that those who back away from golden opportunities may never get another chance.



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